i am literally such a pain in the neck to myself. my left side, now my right side... my ninja trainer told me to get this clay heating-pad thingy at walgreens and it is REALLY good. it's called THERMIPAQ and i can totally recommend it. i just pop it in the microwave for a minute and it stays pretty hot... what's really neat-o is that it's all mold-a-ble cuz it's like, clay. it also works as a cold-pack, but haven't tried it.i must thank CORNELIUS, KATI, AND JV for their helpful comments/feedback. i hope you will feel free to comment MUCH MUCH MORE and give me lots of ADVICE, WISDOM, CRITICISM, etc. i am open to any suggestions, seriously. i feel like (is this just another excuse? u can tell me) being an only child you get conditioned to having too much alone-time to mull things over. too much time to mull and re-mull and re-play things in your head--maybe if i had had some siblings to fight with i'd be tougher today. or maybe i'd have more of a sense of place in the world. or maybe i could compare/contrast with them and therefore have more self-knowledge or something, be less doubting and stuff. actually it's not so lofty what i wanted--just to be medium pretty and medium athletic and have a SUPER HOT boyfriend who makes a SH*tload of money...NO, you know i'm kidding of course!! (he only has to be medium-hot and he can be PENNILESS, i don't care--as long as he cooks and cleans and treats me like a princess. (NO, i'm KIDDING-- but he really should be able to hook up a dvd player and change the oil in my car--NO...really i'm joking) )...
Hey,
ReplyDeleteI really think all the doubting ironically eases our anxiety. I do it all the time. It takes guts to acknowledge our own success and our own beauty as humans. Major guts. And courage, right? Doubting and being negative about things is actually easier, because it lowers the stakes -if life sucks then we have less to lose. If things are good, then there's so much more to worry about.
The fact that you have this cool blog is proof that you know you have something to say. That's a beautiful thing. Maybe you should have more reverence for yourself?
As far as the arbitrary goes... it sucks a lot of the time. But sometimes it's really cool, like that time you ran into the guy from 30 Rock, right?
Best,
Neil
neil: u came up with the perfect example (from my own life,too- wow)of Beauty of Arbitrary--+something u know i absolutely cannot ignore/dismiss. also, your points about courage made my brain all perked-up like after a shot of espresso. i knew your brain could help mine!
ReplyDeletei'm re-naming my blog "dear cornelius". i think i'm in love with you. (amy doesn't mind right?)